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Author Topic: The Rise of the... (working Title) By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear  (Read 3335 times)

Offline Starbear

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Over at the Wanderers page (the fleet I currently belong to) I've started a storyline that chronicles a Kzinti girl and sheds some light on Kzinti socioty (though its all fan fiction, unless some person decideds to let me publish it). At the moment its extreamly rough, and in its early stages but feel free to read it and let me know what you think. I will admit I'am taking a bit of writers liberty in some of the concepts, but with so little information on the Kzinti I realy have no choice. What I'am trying to do is put all the bits together, I have refrences that cross refrences and so forth so I'm taking everything I've read about Kzinti and creating a solid concept around them.

Again at the moment, its very early and I've just recently started it (within the last day) so its deffently a work in progress. I'll be adding to it in the future as well as giving more backround in the origonal post. For those of you who arn't part of the Wanderers I have to point out that you should not post in that thread if you do join up, as its "closed" and only open to me the author to post in, so if you have feedback just use this thead ;D

http://forums.stowanderers.com/index.php?topic=46.0
« Last Edit: 06 March 2008 12:09 AM by Starbear »

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Offline BLZBUB

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Re: The Rise of the Kzinti (By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear)
« Reply #1 on: 03 March 2008 01:31 AM »
 I like that alot Starbear! I am surprised that the Kzinti government would purposefully inhibit the sentience of their females...interesting!
 If I may interject one thought though...you could use a spell checker program...just for some of your more pronounced errors.  :andorian1:
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Offline Starbear

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Re: The Rise of the Kzinti (By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear)
« Reply #2 on: 03 March 2008 03:25 AM »
Wow thank you much, it always makes me want to write more when I know people like it haha. As for spellcheck, I'm quite aware of my horrid skills in spelling out the english language... I blame my 1st grade teacher rofl. I will be porting the whole story into word and running spell check as well as breaking some of the massive paragraphs up and overall adding a ton of polish. I'll be adding to the story regularly, some times even more than once a day, so if you like it feel free to keep up on it (heck I'd love to get the story published one day haha, but I don't know how easy or hard it is to get the owners of the Trek label to allow you to publish).

I do plan on doing some sketches, I was about to sketch the exterior of the Kryn station, and when I introduce some of the ship designes for the Draconis Alliance and Kurt's ship I'll post them in the thread as well as here at the Shipyard. I will admit my biggest issue as a writer (other than spelling haha) is not describing enough of the characters suroundings. Often my first runs of a chapter are very spartan, but I will be going back and adding detailed descriptions of the locations the characters are in, though do feel free to let me know if a scean is under devloped, as feedback from readers is of great help.

Thanks again for reading I'm glad you like it so far.  :gorn6:

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Offline Zach

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Re: The Rise of the Kzinti (By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear)
« Reply #3 on: 03 March 2008 03:46 AM »
I'll print out a copy of this tomorrow and have a read.

I hate reading long posts / storys on a screen, cant tolerate it, so as i said, i will print it.

Offline Starbear

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Re: The Rise of the Kzinti (By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear)
« Reply #4 on: 03 March 2008 04:17 AM »
I'm hoping to have some of the spelling issues and such worked out later tonight so if you haven't printed it yet you may get the edited version :D.

Also I'll be going back and adding some content to the first section tonight or tomorrow, you know more descriptions and so forth.

Added Note: I've added more to the story as well as run the whole thing through spell check so it should be a bit more polished. Later I plan on going through and adding some content and refining what is already there, possibly adding in more descriptions of locals and such, though I will also be trying to keep the storyline progressing at the same time.
« Last Edit: 03 March 2008 05:42 AM by Starbear »

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Offline Starbear

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Re: The Rise of the Kzinti (By: Bernard Mangold/Starbear)
« Reply #5 on: 04 March 2008 12:30 AM »
(I haven't been told I can't double post haha... that was one of the rules over at sto.net so I'm going to haha). I've updated the storyline, into Chapter 1, and I will be adding to it and putting it through the editing runs later tonight. Also I'm going to rework the origonal post so that it has a basic overview of the Kzinti built into it, not just about the Kzinti, but where they came from and who created them as well as how they made there way into trek.

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